“.@RudyGiuliani, by far the greatest mayor in the history of NYC, and who has been working tirelessly exposing the most corrupt election (by far!) in the history of the USA, has tested positive for the China Virus. Get better soon Rudy, we will carry on!!!”
“This criticism is fair. It doesn’t matter whether something is technically allowed or not—I need to hold myself to a higher standard and I will do better.”
Mayor of San Francisco
“There’s plenty of data that could show in states with mask mandates are also having record cases and record deaths. If someone can show me the correlation between the mandate and their performance, that would be a good thing to see.”
Governor of South Dakota
“As has been stated by numerous legal scholars, I have the absolute right to PARDON myself, but why would I do that when I have done nothing wrong?”
“The president out the door needs to pardon his whole family and himself because they want this witch hunt to go on in perpetuity. They’re so full of rage and insanity against the president.”
The Richest Person at Rite-AID
“That’s all I hear about now. That’s all I hear. Turn on television—Covid, Covid, Covid, Covid, Covid, Covid. A plane goes down. 500 people dead, they don’t talk about it. Covid, Covid, Covid, Covid. By the way, on November 4, you won’t hear about it anymore.”
“Who gives a fuck about the Christmas stuff and decorations? But I need to do it, right?”
“For purposes of National Security, Section 230 must be immediately terminated!!!”
“I encourage all Americans to gather, in homes and places of worship, to offer a prayer of thanks to God for our many blessings.”
“I can tell you we’ve come to a conclusion, and Carrots, I’m sorry to tell you the result did not change. It’s too bad for Carrots.”